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This is how they get you.

You want to stay in London because despite the fact London doesn't care about you and probably never will you like it here.

You need to pay the rent, the bills, the council tax.

So you get a job. You think, just for now, I need to pay the rent, the bills, the council tax, but I won't give up on my dream, this I just to survive.

But then you find you don't have the time to pursue the dream outside the hours of work, you just want to relax after your 9-5 or do something fun. Then you find it is over a year since you did anything successful towards what you ACTUALLY want to do for a living.

Then your despair kicks in and you start to think that maybe things are too late, that you should just sink into this mundane career you have started. But you still dream.

It makes you unhappy sure, but what choice do you have? You need to pay the rent, the bills, the council tax, you need to buy clothes and food and booze, spend money on train tickets and oyster cards, buy sandwiches rather than make them because you forgot to have breakfast AGAIN because you didn't want to get out of bed. Which just makes you more unhappy. Finally you realise your brain has turned to mush and you don't care about work, the rent, the bills, the council tax you are simply a cog in a giant machine.

So realising this you pour out your melancholy onto your blog you have had since you were a student in the hope that doing so shakes you up enough to actually DO something about your ever-increasing slide into middle age. And you pray is shocks your Brain with it's catharsis and as soon as you post you ACTUALLY, not SWEAR, PROMISE or DECIDE, but ACTUALLY DOOOOO something about your life.

That's how they get you and that's how I'm getting out.

Ram

Top five jobs/vocations:

1: Archaeologist
2: Stage Manager
3: Herald
4: Writer
5: Buddhist Monk

"In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act."

George Orwell